The State of DCEU: Part 2

OP-ED by Anna Aaron, Visual Journalist

So we’re back on the second installment of my movie reviews of the DCEU according to Snyder. I had been putting it off only because to really write a decent post, I’d have to watch the movie AGAIN. Besides that I spent hours on the last post and continued making additional edits after it was published. For this post though, I will be reviewing the Extended Cut not the Theatrical Cut which no one should even bother watching as it’s missing key footage to make sense. Reboot. At this point I’ll try to blather less about this film since it doesn’t really matter at this point. Reboot. But then again there’s too much going on in the movie to begin with. Reboot. Please note there are no subliminal messages in this post.

If you missed Part 1, click here to check it out.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

So much anticipation for this movie— the trailers, the announcements of who’s playing who, the chatter on forums— it was a set-up for an epic fail. It tried to be everything: the sequel to MOS, the set-up for Justice League, fulfillment of comic panels as live-action, Snyder’s vision of an ultra-realistic depiction of how he feels the world would react to metahumans and aliens.

Overall, it was largely forgettable.

This is not a film you want to watch on repeat unless you want the depression and dark blue-green imagery seared into your subconscious that you start dreaming in those colors. See the above image of a Joker cosplayer at C2E2. Do you see it? I ‘Snyderized’ him.

First Impressions

I remember the screams and applause only when Wonder Woman showed up. That’s because she came to salvage what was left of the dark puddle of bat poop, Kryptonite and Lex’s hair fallout of a movie.

Snyder

Darkness, grit, gloom and unneeded scenes on repetition. Heavy and intense come to mind. At least the soundtrack was epic. Strings of diabolical villainy play along with echoes of the Kryptonian battle march and then taking you back to the cornfields of Kansas in good old fashioned Americana. And then there’s Wonder Woman’s theme. It stands out from everything only because it’s fresh, epic and cool. Still asking where is Green Lantern? Martian Manhunter?

The Heroes aka Batman’s Bishes

Batman

This was the movie where we got to see Affleck as Batman for the first time. We also see a repetitive origin story most notably of his parents getting killed. In the beginning, during the Kryptonian attack on the city, he played a good pissed-off Batman and that’s about all. Angry Batman=good. Strategist=nope. World’s Greatest Detective=nope. Tactician=nope. Watching this first bit, you would think the rest of the movie would follow suit. It is a movie that centers around Batman and his desire to take out Superman. We get peeks into his inner life through disturbing dream sequences.

One of those dreams is the arrival of Darkseid, his parademons and Superman turning evil because of the death of Lois. I wouldn’t be too thrilled living in a world where an alien superbeing would turn pyscho if a human woman he loved dies. Not much of a hero to look up to.

The other dream sequence or visit from Flash of the future is equally as disturbing. So if Snyder continued with these films, we’d see an evil Superman serving Darkseid? Time for a reboot!

Jimmy Olsen

So much for being Superman’s best friend. Gets killed off fast. I think it was then I knew the movie was going to tank for me fast.

Might as well include Mercy. She gets killed off too. I guess Lex plans on cloning her.

Lois Lane

The quintessential damsel in distress. She’s reckless as a journalist really. Out of all the journos that need saving, this is the one Superman saves 24/7. Think about that. She for the most part is predictable in this movie just moving the plot along in the only way she knows how.

Lex Luthor

Maybe if we had Mark Zuckerberg playing Data it would have been more entertaining. Still think Lex should have been older. A different take. Some liked it, some didn’t. That squeaky voice. He really has issues with religion.

Wonder Woman

She saved the movie from the nonstop yawn fest and gave hope to the upcoming Wonder Woman movie. Everything else though prior to that saving Batman’s a@@ scene was questionable. Showing up to steal a photo? There were many questions that were raised. Where was she all this time? With Superman showing up and the destruction, her non-presence is perplexing.

Also as Diana Prince she should be wearing glasses.

Aquaman/Flash/Cyborg

The first sight of him he appears to struggle in the water, seriously. The video of Flash in the convenience store was ok. Cyborg becoming Cyborg, meh. What I wanna know is who did the logos for each of these metahumans? Take about advanced branding. Go Lex!

Good Parts:

(not many)

“We just have a bad history with freaks dressed as clowns.” – Bruce Wayne. That whole dialogue was a brutal smack-down. Better than the smack down they had later on. Loved it.
“I like those shoes.” – Bruce Wayne giving compliment to Mercy. Ok, I am struggling to find good parts!
“Oh I don’t think you’ve ever known a woman like me. It’s true what they say about little boys born with no natural inclination to share.” -Diana Prince. Epic put-down!

Still asking where is Green Lantern? Martian Manhunter?

Superman/Clark Kent

There’s not much heroics going in with him as he spends most of the movie thinking about the problem of Batman. Instead of forging an alliance… Everybody’s obsessed about Batman while Lex is obsessed about Superman. Obsession overload. Even the battle scene at the end doesn’t inspire, you just know it’s not going to end well. They killed Superman again. DC’s got that down real good.

The whole Martha thing wouldn’t have been a problem if he used his superhearing to find her like when he’s so tuned into Lois. He saved her from terrorists, caught her as she was falling, chatted with her while she was getting into the taxi. It’s almost like he’s stalking her.

On the Clark Kent side, he is one lousy reporter. Of course what would you expect since he just shows up at the Daily Planet in the last film. He should have been fired. In the real world, he probably would have been.

Doomsday

He’s quite the lovable character right? He looks like a cave troll. There is not much to say about him. Too bad General Zod got killed off and turned into this. If I were Zod, I’d be pissed off too.

Additional Complaints or more like Pet Peeves

(a long list)

So did Superman kill the terrorist that was holding the gun to Lois? I mean there’s no way he could have survived being thrown through several walls. And was that really warranted? Is that what Superman would do?
I already complained about the snuffing out of Jimmy Olsen. Think of all those dorky things Superman did to Jimmy in the comics. Turning him into a human balloon with ears like a mule and making him die of thirst. A lost opportunity now if you ask me.
Batman is The Punisher.
It’s amazing watching Superman destroy most of Metroplis punching Zod while later on in the film he jumps into the tub with Lois without even cracking it. Such control [insert eye roll]. Remember he’s a human pretending to be a Kryptonian. That scene was so forced. And seriously wouldn’t you be creeped out having your alien boyfriend jump into the tub with his clothes on? I’d turn into pissed off mama and start cussing for him to clean it all up and stop making a mess. Don’t get me wrong I’m a romantic but not a sloppy one!
The eggs are undercooked Clark! OMG!
So Clark dies around the same time Superman does and nobody notices the resemblance. They really didn’t have to put his picture in the obituary, it’s like a dead giveaway.
Lois not telling Clark about the bullet. Keeping secrets is not a good thing in any relationship unless you’re planning a surprise birthday party.
Jesse Eisenberg struggling to make Lex appear as a madman. It just comes off as somebody who does too many drugs.
Only Batman notices Diana.
It would have been nice to see Superman rescue a cat out of a tree.
A Democratic Senator from Kentucky? Senator Finch, it’s a federal republic and a constitutional representative democracy. There I fixed it for ya.
So Lois dies and Superman turns evil because she was “his world”. Oh great.
The Lang farm washed away? Dang. Poor Lana.
“100,000 worlds.” – Kryptonian scoutship computer. That’s a lot of knowledge. Why isn’t Superman learning about all this? You know get edge on any possible adversaries. That’s making him too smart, I guess.
The whole “Martha” thing. Do I have to even explain?
Throwing the Kryptonite spear into the water, nice going Lane.
Why didn’t they move the Kryptonian ship out of the city?
Why does Diana look so shocked to see metahumans? Like she’s fought the gods and comes from Themyscira.

Epic Moments

(you’ll notice not much)

Bruce Wayne running into the cloud of debris to rescue the girl.
Batman waiting in the corner of the wall behind the cop. That was creepy asf.
Wonder Woman showing up giving some much need heroics and fighting. Fix it girl!
The inverted picture in Lex’s mansion. So creepy.
Grandma’s Peach Tea at the hearing. More evil creepiness.
Superman fighting Doomsday (some parts) but it gets messed up when he has to go save Lois.
“Is she with you?” “I thought she was with you?” – That line and the Trinity shot.
Loved the landline telephone in Ma Kent’s bedroom.
Honorable mention to the presence of Kryptonite. While in Man of Steel, Kryptonians deal with the physics of a different atmosphere and gravitational field making them weak, here we finally get a chunk of rock that basically does the same thing.

So that’s that. You made it to the end of another review. Woo-hoo!
I already own this movie. Do I regret buying it? Nah, I’m a DC girl even though it’s not my fave. I did wish the sun would come out in this movie but it never does.

Until Part 3…